Cultivation

I have an orchid that I keep in my room, and it makes me feel good. Plants give me a peace to be near, I love how they work, and how they're beautiful without trying. I love how complex they are, systems within systems within systems, with no muscles, no consciousness, just a blueprint of infinite detail and a seed, and "go". The flowers on my orchid have started to wilt, and the reason is that I have not watered it for nearly three weeks. I haven't watered it! This plant I love that makes me happy! The sink is NOT FAR. Seven, eight steps away at most. And I know I need to water my orchid every week. It needs water on the inside for a while before it starts showing it on the outside; it is resilient. External clues mean there has been a period of neglect already.
Yeah, this analogy carries. I watered it yesterday, but it will lose at least one flower. Maybe more, depending on the stress. And I feel bad about it, but why didn't I take six minutes and do this any time in the last fortnight? I am often bad at maintenance. I am particularly bad at self-maintenance. I do not care for myself in the way I know I need. For some reason I forget every time until it starts showing on the outside. If there had been a little card that came with me from the shop with my latin name and basic care instruction, it would say I need to be watered daily, with prayer and with scripture.
I can be resilient for a little while. But enduring is not what I want my legacy to be. Come on, me. Passion is easy; consistency is hard. It is our consistency which ultimately defines us.

-J